Well, hello once more, my risqué rapscallions. Finding yourself on the wrong path into the dark and dreadful forest of misgivings has always been a tense encounter indeed. And thankfully, the streaming sphere has magnified all your angst by supplying ample examples for you to experience and explore.
The Classic Horror Story (Netflix)
I liked it. It was weird. It was savage. It was brutally gross and grisley to the bone. Sure, it had similarities to other more iconic road trips gone horribly wrong but honestly, there’s a purpose to it all. Just wait until the the very end of all the carnage to discover the reasons why—if you dare. Also, turn the American dubbing on for that old school Euro-horror film fun 1970’s style.
Directors: Roberto De FeoPaolo Strippoli
Screenplay: Lucio Besana, Roberto De Feo, Paolo Strippoli
Cast: Matilda Anna Ingrid Lutz, Francesco Russo, Peppino Mazzotta
A grisly thriller whereby strangers carpool to southern Italy. En route, they become stranded in the woods, where they encounter a brutal clan who want their eyes, ears, and tongues to complete a gory ancient ritual.
Wrong Turn – 2021 (Amazon Prime)
Wrong Turn, a reboot of the iconic series of the same name was bloody brutal, too. There are buckets of crimson goo gushing, splattering, and oozing everywhere you looked. The exhausted foley folks must’ve gone a bit nutty trying to find all the various sounds to match all the excessive bloodbaths. The first casualty almost made me loose my buttered popcorn. It was so nauseating and unflinching in its gore that for a few seconds, I thought I was watching a documentary. In fact, there’s so much icky violence that it even continues while the credits roll.
Director: Mike P. Nelson
Screenplay: Alan B. McElroy
Cast: Charlotte Vega, Adain Bradley, Bill Sage, Matthew Modine, and Tim DeZarn
Despite warnings to stick to the Appalachian Trail, hikers stray off course and cross into land inhabited by a hidden community of mountain dwellers who use deadly means to protect their way of life. Suddenly under siege, the friends seem headed to the point of no return — unless one man can reach them in time.
Wrong Turn – The Series – 2003-2014 (Amazon Prime and others)
Take a weekend off and watch all six gory flicks back-to-back for a mind-altering experience to keep you squarely off the beaten path and out of the woods for the rest of your entire natural life—I guarantee it. They all get pretty high splatter marks and have a large ghoulish following, so you’d be in excellent creepy company. BTW, the first Wrong Turn is, in my opinion, the best of the bunch. What’s yours?
Directors: Mike P. Nelson, Rob Schmidt, Joe Lynch, Valeri Milev, Declan O’Brien
Screenplay: Alan B. McElroy, Turi Meyer, Alfredo Septién, and others
Cast: Eliza Dushku, Jeremy Sisto, Emmanuelle Chriqui, Erica Leerhsen, Henry Rollins, and others
Six people find themselves trapped in the woods of West Virginia hunted down by “cannibalistic mountain men grossly disfigured through generations of in-breeding”.